I have been thinking about hope a lot lately.  It occurred to me, that when l am hopeful, disappointment is impossible, even if it is only in that moment.  One simply cannot feel both emotions at the same time. Hope influences the very heart of one’s attitude. I guess you could say that hopefulness is the heart of optimism.

Being optimistic in today’s world can be difficult.  We are inundated with bad news on a continuous basis.  It is no wonder that depression is a part of many of our lives.  And economic conditions play an enormous role as our world becomes more dominated by the lopsided distribution of wealth. This can tend to make those who are financially impoverished, more prone to a state of hopelessness.

In spite of having good reason to lose hope, there are people who do not succumb to this attitude. I have always marveled at those with little means who still are able to see the glass as half full.  Perhaps it is because those folks also have a good measure of faith as well. Faith and hope together are a dynamic force.

Now comes the hard part.  If one does not have hope, one can be headed down the path to despair.  To me, there is nothing worse than this. That is the best reason to cling to it.  And for those of us who have compassion and time, friendship can indeed be a gift one can give to a person going through such a trial. Being there, with someone who is  living through a difficult time, is powerful.

Whenever human beings reach out to help each other, hope grows in abundance.  It is so important in our world, to see each other’s struggles and be with them in their time of need.  For, if we can see our lives as interconnected, we can make our world a kinder place. And by doing this, hope will increase.  All of this can happen, because hope doesn’t disappoint.

Many years ago, a mentor of mine, who was also a librarian, said, “Sometimes, all we have are words.”  I remember thinking about that statement in different ways, trying to figure out all the possibilities of what she might have meant.  In all communication, choosing just the right word(s) is a tremendous challenge.

Sometimes, words are so powerful that just a few of them can be capable of causing great things to happen.  The proper words of a commander to his/her troops or a coach to her/his team can rouse them into action and even heroic deeds.  Words can indeed be mighty forces.

Words, when spoken softly to a baby or a friend or spouse can be capable of soothing pain or easing fear, expressing love, or all three.  Strength is shown in different ways according to their purpose. Vocabulary is important, but the feeling attached to them is what gives them their true significance.

Words can be spoken or written or inferred by other words.  That is reason enough to choose wisely.  Sometimes unspoken words are the most significant.  

Written words, especially, must be selected carefully.  Once written, if words are in any way ambiguous, then their meaning is up to the reader to decide.  This is not a good idea, if one wants to be clearly understood. Everything that is written, has an audience to be considered. And words, once written or spoken, cannot be taken back.

When one speaks to an audience, the clarity of words are of utmost importance.  The journey of words, whether seen through the eye or heard by the ear can be full of pitfalls. That is why proofreaders are employed by newspapers and publishers and why professional listeners are needed as well.

Whatever one wants to say or write, or infer, the truth is, words are all we have with which to do it.  I have always loved words and relish the act of learning new ones everyday.  Maybe that’s why I love writing and reading and composing so much. Each of us has our own unique way to use words.  And there are enough words to go around. Just ask George and Charles Merriam. Ask Noah Webster. They ought to know!

While a good sense of humor cannot solve every one of our problems, it sure can help a person get through them.  I think that being able to laugh, in spite of what happens, can give one the chance to do more than simply survive the challenges we face on a daily basis.  When humor is present, it’s like having a friend at your side, ready to tackle life’s troubles with you.

It is difficult at best, to face the major traumas of our lives if we can’t find the lighter side of a situation.  I have observed and experienced the gathering of people who have just lost a loved one. People will begin to share their stories, and sooner or later, there will be one that is funny and everyone is able to smile or laugh at the memory.  Those memories will serve to soften the blows of grief.

One must have a sense of the ridiculous at times.  When my mother and I were stuck in a bathroom together, for many hours, we couldn’t stop laughing at the comedy of errors that had gotten us there.  Without our sense of the ridiculousness of our dilemma, we would have been miserable and hopeless. Instead, we got through it by laughing, (also praying, dancing and singing), and now we have a great story to tell for the rest of our lives.  If we had worried, it would have taken on a very different life of its own. Instead, we got through it and bonded more deeply.

Of course, it is always good to laugh on a daily basis.  I think we become better at it with practice. It seems to me, that if a person wanted to, making a list of funny things, such as movies, jokes, silly stories of our lives, (to name a few,) maybe we each could create an arsenal of good humor to attack our bad humor. They could then serve to be the “beneficial weapons” we turn to when sad or bad times come into our lives. Now, if that isn’t ridiculous terminology, I don’t know what is!

I would like to think that consideration, just a simple gesture of human respect, would be something that we acquired easily as children.  I’d have thought it would be a natural inclination for human beings to be openly interested in being this way. Perhaps it is. But maybe, it must be nurtured in order to become a regular habit in our daily dealings with other people.

I have come to believe that if indeed we have this instinct, so to speak, that it can either be negated or encouraged by the people around us when we are young.  So, that would make it something that must be intentionally taught to have lasting impact.

This may seem to be a small thing to do.  At least, to me it does, because of my life experience. Logically, it would mean that this trait would have been learned in the previous generation. Therein may lie a problem. If this behavior has broken down long ago in the generational train, then it has to be learned somewhere else.

If not at home, school would seem to be the next logical place to learn to be considerate. Unfortunately, when children are exposed to any inappropriate behavior by other students, the problem is exacerbated there.  Peer pressure is responsible for a lot of unacceptable conduct. This is especially true in middle school and on into high school.  Consideration suffers because of this. It is not a “cool” thing to do.

Eventually, most people will learn that it is to their advantage to behave in certain ways in order to achieve their goals.  The only problem in today’s society, is that it has become more acceptable to be unkind, and still find economic success. And sometimes being nice and considerate is seen to be a weakness.  I guess this has always been true. But technology has the power to influence young and old alike, sometimes not for the better.

That brings me to the conclusion of this particular rambling.  If consideration is to become the norm, we will have to collectively make it so.  If enough of us decide that consideration is an important aspect of daily living in our society we will become a critical mass.  A critical mass can create the chain reaction that could change our world into a much more considerate place. Wouldn’t it be wonderful to be part of this quest, and each do our part to make this true?  I think so. And if you have read thus far, I think that you might feel this way too.

I never think much about moods, until I am in a bad one.  If I feel down or discouraged, I often do not realize just how much it effects me until I no longer feel that way.  Isn’t it funny how much it a mood can deplete or invigorate us?

It reminds me of what my son used to say about my dad.  He said, “You never have to worry about what kind of a mood Grandpa will be in.”  My dad was a happy man, content within himself. It was such a blessing. Moods can really matter in a relationship.

I feel pretty positive most of the time, so it really catches me off guard when I wake up in a funk. It is especially confusing if there doesn’t seem to be a cause for it. I often wonder about that.

Moods are affected by light, especially natural sunlight.  That’s probably one of the reasons people like to go to the beach.  And weather can affect us in that way too.

There are literally hundreds of words that describe moods.  I had no idea until I researched this.  And the possible reasons for them are endless.  Hormones and neurotransmitters, side effects of medications, psychiatric reasons and and reactions to physical injury, menopause and puberty, all are sources.  And the list goes on and on. No wonder we have mood swings. There are so many of them.

Before I started to write about this, I had never really thought much about it, because I am usually pretty even-keeled.  I had no idea how fortunate I am in this regard. I guess this presents an opportunity to think differently.  It can be valuable to remember that the way someone behaves toward you or another person is not always under that person’s control.

We don’t have to take it personally if someone behaves badly toward us.  Nor do we need to react without giving it some thought. We rarely know what is going on in another person’s mind, unless we know them really well.  Even then, we shouldn’t assume to understand unless we have some facts to back up our thinking.

If we consider these things in advance, there are lots of ways we can avoid conflict.  If we try to step into another person’s shoes, it is bound to help us understand the possibilities without taking things personally.

I think I learned something today.  That is always a good thing. Whenever I do this, it helps me evolve a little.  And isn’t that a good thing too? It’s even improved my mood. Wow!