There is a quote stating that “humility is not thinking less of yourself – it’s thinking of yourself less.”  It has incorrectly been attributed to C.S Lewis and others as its author. However, regardless of who wrote this, it is a profound statement that clearly captivates the essence of this word.  I think that many people, myself included, might find this description to be just about perfect.

I have had trouble with this word because of the unfortunate and incorrect connotation that humility means to think less of one’s self.  If someone has the mindset of being less than, it affects the ability to even “be there” for another person.  Being present with a friend or family member requires a person to have self worth.  Otherwise, it’s possible to make a person who is suffering feel bad for you or feel less important to you.  When one has the attitude of being “less than” it takes the focus off of the other person and interferes with any semblance of help to them.

It is actually quite difficult to be around someone who debases oneself.  If it happens often with another person when they are around you, you want to avoid them.  I do, I am sorry to say.  I am not proud of this, but that is a feeling most of us get when we are uncomfortable with someone’s behavior.  Of course, that is when a person is challenged to rise to the occasion and perhaps just “be there” with them.

Being humble is a challenge.  It seems to me that maybe we need to practice thinking of ourselves “less” on a regular basis.  When I think of all the people I admire the most, I realize that it is their humility that draws me to them.  They are not the ones to think less of themselves.  In fact, they have healthy self-esteem, an attribute that is attractive and one that invites other people to be themselves around them. 

Humility is a valuable trait to develop.  It is good for you and the people around you.  A gift that helps oneself and at the same time can help another who needs a friend.  A worthy pursuit indeed!