It has always seemed to me, that being at home with one’s self, i.e. being comfortable in one’s skin, should be a given.  But it’s not.  Maybe it’s due to societal expectations, insecurity in one’s peer group, and other reasons for self-doubt, that many of us are not self-assured and don’t just naturally like ourselves.

During puberty and the teen years, peer pressure is intense.  That is a powerful reason to be uneasy with oneself, when that is exactly the time when self-confidence could be most beneficial.  Our society does not deliver a positive message to us very well, often because there are economic reasons for us as potential customers, to feel that we need “things” to be good enough.  And we often believe the advertising.  

In fact, there are far more forces that seek to sell remedies for our deficiencies than those that boost self-esteem.  So being comfortable with the one person we are always in company with, is difficult, at best.  By the time we are adults, most of us come to a point of self-acceptance.  But, do we really feel comfortable in our own skin?  I think that more often than not, we don’t. I know I struggle at times with my feelings about this, even as a senior citizen.  But this doesn’t happen often.  I am still a work in progress, but I am ever closer to the finished project with each passing year.

So what can humans do to be more self-assured and less critical of ourselves?  Well, one thing we can all do is avoid being around negative people.  Just say “no” when this kind of person wants to be around you.  Make other plans.  Do the things that make you feel valued.  Surround yourself with the people who love and care about you.  Just by avoiding negative energy, one’s positive energy grows.

I grew up in a family that encouraged me and didn’t make me feel “less than” other people.  I was loved and respected.  Sadly, this not true for everyone.  But the way in which people see themselves is a decision.  Since we each are the most important person to please, let’s decide to collectively raise the opinions of ourselves and others.  Only good can come from this.  Let’s do it!