When I think about all the deep unrest and fear in this world, I am reminded that one cannot hold two opposing mindsets at the same time.  If one chooses to be thankful for this life and all that it entails, it is nearly impossible to feel anything but happy.  Gratitude is at the very heart of peace.  Try it for yourself, if you don’t already know this to be true.

Just try to bring to mind all that causes you to feel gratitude.  Whenever I begin my day by doing this, I find that one thing leads to another and I finally have to stop myself and go on with the day’s routine.  This is powerful and important to remember when anxious about what is happening in our own lives and of those we care about and love.  Negative thoughts can only produce more distress, and never will give rise to a positive outcome.

It would behoove each of us to try to start our day in this manner, if for no other reason than healthy self-interest.  Feeling bad about the details of our lives not only magnifies our problems, but indeed, can even create new ones.  The food that feeds our minds can be sweet and rich or full of garbage.  It is our choice.

Our brains are vital and dynamic and we can use them to create affirmations.  These affirmations can bolster the mindset we choose to hold.  This is how we can create peace and joy for ourselves and others.  We are in control of our thoughts and what we put into our minds and hearts.  That is exactly why one must choose his or her own path and not be led by those who do not have our best interests at heart.  There are many forces that will always be trying to gain access to our free will and use it for their own gain.

So, wake up in the morning and decide what kind of a world you want to live in.  Peace and joy are there waiting to be discovered, each and everyday.  All we have to do is be thankful.

The word “awesome” is commonly used to describe something good, or really cool.  However,  “awe” can, and perhaps should, be so much more than a casual term because there are experiences that require its usage to fully describe its meaning.  Maybe, this word could be reserved for the intense, breath-taking, moments that give our lives a capacity for pure joy and the buoyancy of the spirit that lives inside of every human being.

Awe is wonder-filled, full to the brim with wonder.  It is the kind of emotion one feels when watching the birth of a baby.  It is the experience of seeing the Grand Canyon or Michelangelo’s David.  Ordinary occurrences are transformed into extraordinary ones.  These events command the expression, “awesome.”

In an article, written by Paula Spencer Scott on this subject, “Feeling awe may be the secret to health and happiness.”  She quoted Albert Einstein, who described feelings of awe as “the source of all true art and science.”  I have felt awe when witnessing children’s capacity to react lovingly and compassionately when they have seen sorrow or distress in another person.  

Being in touch with nature is awe-inducing.  It has been known to relieve depression and boost one’s well-being.  Sharing awesome experiences can intensify them and bring great joy to both parties.  It is linked with physical and psychological healing.  Awe makes one happier and more peaceful and cooperative.

In this world of distractions and addiction to phones and other devices, we must make an effort to break away from these influences to feel the bliss of nature, art and other wonders in our lives. These are the ways to find the contentment that is sorely needed to counteract the negativity and stress of our daily routines.  These are moments that can transform the ordinary into the extraordinary.  It’s worth the effort.  We might even find addictions that are good for us.  That would truly be “awesome.”

There are so many negative influences in our world.  From simple disagreements to all out war and horrific acts of violence.  People from the very beginning of time have had conflicts with each other.  Sometimes, the two sides of diametrically opposing factions cannot come together and simply have a civil conversation.  We see this everyday.  What are we to do?

First of all, before doing anything, STOP.  Relax and breathe.  Slow down inner thoughts.  Try not to think at all.  Just sit.  Listen to the silence.  These actions alone will lower the heart rate.  Take time to think more clearly before speaking.

If you pray, pray.  If you meditate, meditate.  If you don’t do either, just think positive thoughts.  You don’t have to be religious to have positive intention.  Belief in God or a higher power is not necessary.  Just be who you are and do what makes you open to the possibility of peace.

When two people interact in hostile ways, the hostility grows with intensity.  Likewise, if the interaction is peaceful, peace grows in kind.  What kind of a world do we want to live in?  

Always, there are wars being waged and the ones who bear the brunt of the suffering are the most helpless and vulnerable of all.  But peace starts inside of each person.  It starts with people wanting to to find common ground where understanding can grow.  

It starts slow.  And we don’t like slow.  But there is no other way to grow peace.  It needs time to root.  It needs time, attention and nurturing.  It is hard work.

Each time we disagree, the work begins again.  Let us roll up our sleeves and get ready to work for peace.  We are worth it.  Peace is worth working for.  And it is the one thing that everyone, yes everyone, can be a part of in this life.  Now is the time.  There is no other moment but now.

There are times when “being there” for someone is the only thing that can be done to help another person.  After something tragic happens, words can get in the way of comforting the one who needs it.  This is especially true when words can be taken in the wrong way, and even make things worse.  Sometimes, words are inadequate, almost empty.  But just being with a person is comforting, especially with people we love.

“Actions speak louder than words” is not a cliche.  Doing mundane chores is often helpful, when another person is unable to attend to these things.  Do what you can.  Talk if they want you to talk, but always be kind.  Think before you speak.  So often, it simply is not necessary.  Holding someone’s hand, putting your arm around someone when they are crying, are sometimes just the thing that is needed.  But just sitting in silence can be the most profound action of all.  Sitting and listening, actively listening, is difficult for most of us because we are “doers.”  It seems as if we are not doing anything at all.  This is far from the truth.  Being there can sometimes be the only thing that helps.

Following their lead is so important.  And never say “I know how you feel” unless it is absolutely true.  It is hurtful, and can even be insulting.  When in doubt, be quiet.  Less is more when talking to someone who is grieving.  Grief is what we feel for many different losses in life.  Death, divorce, the loss of a job are all devastating in their own way.  They are not the same, but each requires a special, caring presence to get through the process.  If a person is not ready for help, wait patiently for them to ask or show you in some way.

Many of the things I am speaking about were learned after the sudden death of my father.  But six years later, my son was killed in an auto accident and the lessons of my survival taught me so much.  Being able to talk about it and be listened to was vital to my healing.  One thing was sure for me.  I felt cared for and loved throughout my grieving because people were there for me.  And that, was everything.

One of my favorite things in life is making people laugh.  I would have loved to do stand up, but I never had enough confidence, or material for that matter.  It would have been really cool, though.  There are some people who are unintentionally funny.  My dad was like that.  I don’t know if I have ever been this way.  I doubt it, as I am always weighing what I say in terms of how it affects other people.

I have always been fortunate enough to have people around me who seem to be easily amused by my comments.  This makes me very happy.  Having a blog still seems really egotistical, when one realizes that you must think that you actually have something to say that people would want to read.  But then, I would think this way because I was educated by nuns.  The nuns that taught me, thought it was a sin to even hint at thinking you did something well.  To them, any good thoughts about oneself smacked of conceit.  That surely isn’t anything to laugh about.

Then, one day, I realized that having a healthy self-image was a good thing.  But it was too late to undo all of the damage that had been done.  It took years for the residual effects of that part of my early education to be reversed.  Now I am old and I care less and less about seeming any way other than what I am.  I say what I think and feel good about it most of the time.

But, back to the jokes.  Joking around and talking about the funny observations one has is an incredible blessing.  Laughter can ease difficult situations and lessen stress.  This is sorely needed, since stress is so much a part of life these days.  It is distress, or bad stress that causes so many illnesses, both physical and mental.

If one can cultivate a good sense of humor, life is dramatically easier, especially when things are not going well.  But it is always a good thing when one does not take oneself seriously.  That is the sign of a great comedian.  Often their humor is born of their own painful experiences.  Humor can be found almost anywhere.  You just need to be on the lookout for it.

Having other people laughing at my jokes has been the start of many wonderful relationships in my life, starting with my own mother.  Not only does she laugh, but she can find humor over and over again in remembered funny stories.  This is the reason I can be funny to others.  I have been adequately supported and inspired by her laughter.

So if you don’t think I am funny, you can just blame my mom!  Just kidding!  The best way to live is with a strong sense of the humor in your own life and connect to the ways that make each one of us a part of the human condition.  And that is no joke!