Sometimes, the passage of time can seem to be cruel. As my memory problems seem to increase daily, I find myself questioning so many of the things I am doing. For instance, the forgetting of why I was going somewhere in my house and what I was going to do once I got there. I know that it happens to most of us, as we age. And this has been a memory issue for me for quite a long time. But the frequency of this behavior has increased exponentially!
When I am in a conversation, I will stop mid-sentence because I forgot where I was going with it. Increasingly, names of people are disappearing. And I used to have such a great memory for names. I mourn this like a death. And indeed, it is a kind of death. I grieve its absence.
In spite of the fact that my friends and family put up with these behaviors, I am so embarrassed when it happens. I look at photographs from the past and can’t remember so many of the people we knew when we lived in a different state. And the people I live around and know now are in the same category, which is worse.
Song lyrics are disappearing. And this is a problem for me because I am a singer. I used to be able to sing so many songs by heart. And now I have to look up the words. But, at least now I can ask my phone and they magically appear before my eyes.
Writing is less of an issue because I can look almost anything up on the internet and find many answers to my queries. Spell check takes care of any spelling errors. All of those things are good news.
I have decided that the only thing I can do to mitigate these issues is to be more grateful for the many things I still can do. After all, memory is a gift and I have been blessed with a wonderful one for many years. It has enriched my life in so many ways. It’s good to remember that being grateful always helps, no matter what happens in our lives.